Under the stars

On a bamboo raft

I am alone

I am adrift

open ocean 

The sea is calm

I go back to this moment

Right before 

I knew you were there

–

The way that 

the thundering of thousands of hooves 

Rushing towards you 

Makes your stomach drop 

It’s the distant rumbling 

That knocks on the core of the earth 

That tells you to run,

Run,

Run

–

Adrenaline pulses through me

Two things occur to me;

1. Isolation is knowing that you are truely alone

2. And fear is knowing something you cant fight is coming for you

–

Circling up from underneath 

so close to the surface

I can feel your breath on my face

In the darkness

Your face illuminated 

Infernal  

Seared into my mind

–

I can feel you your ghost 

Haunting me

Taunting me

You won

I lost 

I lost 

I lost

–

I can’t use dove soap because it smells like trying to get you off me

I can’t drink bourbon because it tastes like trying to drink you away

I can’t sweat you out, I can’t cut you out, I can’t bleed you out 

But Jesus Christ I have tried 

Im so fucked up over you.

Sometimes I go back to that starry night on my little raft

And for a moment before the hooves

The sea is calm

But I’ve been here before

I know whats coming

I know where the wild things are

And you cant outrun something thats already inside